The Finger 3

On vestigial parts: The finger is fully functional now. A little stiff, less so weak, and vaguely soar if articulated or pressed the wrong way. But typing feels the same as ever. Eating also. Buttoning pants and doing up zippers are back to normal. Most activities except, and there’s a theme developing…

Buttoning shirts and tying shoelaces. For these two actions, The finger and some part of my brain autonomously but tenderly lift the finger back to keep it out of harm’s way, as if it’s still wrapped up and half-severed. Why?

I think one interesting detail sets these two things apart from the before mentioned tasks: I do these two things somewhat often but not regularly, as opposed to pants that go on everyday. I also operate eating utensils and a keyboard everyday and several times each day. But buttoned shirts are uncommon (once a week?) and, these summer days, I usually wear shoes without laces. In contrast, these two tasks were performed more often in the cooler climate during the height of the injury*. It seems to me that, post-wrap removal, through necessity and repetition, the finger was fully integrated on some tasks ASAP, but, through a lack of need and infrequency of task, the finger is yet to be re-conditioned for other activities.

In everything I do, I hope to exercise thought and intention. But it’s not hard to find microcosms of how a good chunk of my day is performed via conditioning. These are small tasks for sure. But what about larger ones? What of my treatment of and reactions to people? See, you got me thinking about kindness, Thomas.


*If not buttoning a shirt, then buttoning a jacket.

The Finger 2

Now that the finger is no longer wrapped up, one of my first thoughts was that I have a certain score to settle with a certain spoon gouge. But I couldn’t find my kevlar glove. So I left it. Either I’ve learned my lesson (no such thing as too safe) or I’ve gotten more squeamish or those two are the same thing. Most probably, the biggest influence was that I knew I would be operating at 90% finger availability, and we know how tremendously things can go wrong even at 100%.

The Finger 1

Thanks to some best case scenario healing, the finger is almost back to its pre-injury form. Now that it’s back… I don’t know how to use it. This is most evident when typing. It’s practically a like a vestigial digit. More on this later.